Anxiety is an epidemic among today’s youth. While it’s always a good idea for anyone with anxiety to seek counseling, mental health professionals are unfortunately in high demand and expensive, so that’s not always an option. If you have a teen who is suffering from anxiety, and you haven’t been able to get them into therapy, this blog is for you.

First of all, understand that you cannot rationalize anxiety, or explain away an anxious person’s worries. Teens with anxiety may perceive danger is everywhere, and you can’t just dismiss their concerns as irrational. While you won’t be able to eliminate their anxiety, there are proven things you can do to help.

Mental health professionals try to give anxious patients some tips or skills to cope with their worries. There are a wide variety of coping techniques for anxiety and the trick is for the anxious person to try different methods and see which ones make them feel better or calm them down. We have collected a wide variety of these coping skills and listed them below for you to share with the anxious person in your life:

Every Day Practices:

Make a Gratitude sandwich: start and end your day with noticing something for which you are grateful.

Practice deep breathing a few minutes each day. Focus on taking deep breaths in and out, feeling the air slowly fill your chest and belly and then slowly leave again. Breathe in for 4, hold for 4, and then breathe out for 4.

Say a few affirmations at the same time each day, such as… I am even stronger than I think I am.  I believe in myself. I trust myself. I will get through this difficult time. I choose to feel calm. I am in charge of my thoughts, and I choose positive thoughts. I am capable. I have been through rough times before, and I have always made it through.

When Feeling Anxious:

Research has shown that nature soothes us, so try changing your environment. Go outside. Breathe fresh air. Take a walk. Focus on greenery. Or if you have to be inside, play birdsong on your phone. Or find a soothing place with a peaceful ambiance. Light a candle and/or play soothing music.

Get perspective by observing your emotions/situation from a distance as though they were someone else’s. Identify the feeling, but don’t label yourself. You are more than any one emotion. What advice would you give a friend facing something similar?

Remind yourself that feelings come and go – this sad or anxious feeling will pass. It’s temporary.

Visualize yourself in a favorite, peaceful or relaxing location or situation. Visit a happy memory in your mind.

Create an uplifting, happy playlist of music, and listen to it whenever you feel anxious.

Try a mindfulness exercise, such as…

• Identify 5 things you can see, 4 things you can touch, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste.
• Consciously relax one muscle at a time, starting with something simple like the fingers in your hand, and move your way through your body.
• Notice physical sensations you are familiar with, like digging your feet into the ground, or feeling the texture of your jeans on your hands. Focus on how each sensation feels.

Repeat a mantra internally. It can be relaxing and reassuring to say something over and over inside your mind to replace the negative thoughts you’re repeating. You might try, “This is temporary, it will pass, and I’m OK.” or you can wish yourself good things, like “You are well. You are healthy. You are peaceful.”

Move. Stress is energy, so put your energy somewhere else, such as a brisk walk, jumping, cleaning, lifting weights, etc.

Try journaling. Writing down your thoughts helps you vent, while the process of writing can be distracting. Journaling can help you process your thoughts and feelings, as well as allow you to see them from a new point of view. Some people like to write down their worries, and then crumple the paper up and throw it away.

Process your emotions in this way… Avoid labeling any of your feelings as “good” or “bad” but rather think of them as information. What are you specifically feeling, why, and what is that feeling trying to tell you?

Final Thoughts…

None of us wants to see our children unhappy, and it can be heartbreaking when we see our tweens or teens experiencing anxiety. Our role is to help them learn to cope with, and reduce, their anxiety and continue to function well despite their worries. The tips above are great ideas for your teen to try, but don’t hesitate to get your child professional help because anxiety is highly treatable! A licensed counselor is trained to help teenagers learn to recognize their triggers and develop techniques to help reduce symptoms and curb negative responses.