Positive parenting emphasizes the communication of clear expectations, collaboration between a parent and their teen, praise and reinforcement for desired behaviors, and the avoidance of harsh consequences. It is an approach that treats kids respectfully, tends to focus on the good in a child, avoids the use of bribes or yelling, and usually builds closer relationships within the family. Researchers
Read moreParenting adolescents is frequently a delicate balancing act – don’t be too strict, nor too lenient; be involved, but not overinvolved; encourage your teen to participate in activities, but don’t over-schedule them; monitor their activities, but don’t snoop. We have basically learned from research that there can be too much of a good thing! This is true with our praise,
Read more“It’s not MY fault!” “That’s not fair!” If you have a child, you have likely heard these statements yelled in your home at some point. These are common reactions to difficulties for children. The problem is that we can unintentionally encourage this type of thinking, which can lead our kids to adapt a victim mentality – when a person tends
Read moreFamilies with teens are BUSY! Between school, homework, part-time jobs, dates, time with friends, and extracurricular activities, adolescents are always on the go. Sometimes it’s hard to coordinate parents and teens to be in the house together for more than a few minutes! Since our families are so busy, many of us understandably turn to eating out at restaurants and
Read more“I was too focused on work. I didn’t spend enough time with him.” “I was overly critical.” “I didn’t listen or take time to understand her.” “I got divorced.” “I yelled too much. I said some hurtful things.” “I wasn’t consistent.” “I pushed too hard.” “I didn’t push enough.” “My teen is out of control, and I don’t know how
Read moreThere is a lot of debate about whether a parent should be a friend to their children. There are strong opinions on both sides of this debate, but in truth, there is a healthy balance between them. Parents should be spending quality time, having fun with their teens, and creating an environment of open communication. In this way, parents are
Read moreThanksgiving is a time to feel grateful, but sometimes gratitude isn’t our first thought when facing holidays with teenagers. Many adults worry how to connect with teens and make it a fun family gathering. Perhaps you are worried how to include fun traditions without treating teens like babies. Certainly, as our children grow up, our holiday celebrations need to grow
Read moreAll of us crave attention. As humans, we seek experiences and relationships that demonstrate we are valued. Children are especially eager for their parents’ attention. And yes, although they don’t always act like it, even teens crave their parents’ care and concern. Experts say that the attention children receive from their parents helps to determine their self-image and their feelings
Read moreThere are many difficult subjects that we are supposed to talk to our youth about – sex, drugs, relationships, crime, depression, alcohol, violence, bullying, peer pressure, safety… well, you get the point. The problem is that all of these subjects can become awkward conversations that often earn eye-rolling and groans in teens. However, difficult conversations are important because they can
Read moreIt is an exciting, heart-wrenching, and overwhelming time when you send your teen off to college for the first time! There are so many things to pack, prepare, and plan. And there are so many changes coming to your lives. As a parent, you will likely feel the need to prepare your teen for what lies ahead. That might mean
Read moreToday’s blog tries to summarize strategies for successfully parenting teenagers found by the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT). MIT’s Raising Teens Project was created to “make research more accessible and useful to those who work with and on behalf of parents, adolescents, and families.” In some of our previous blogs, we have covered many of these same ideas, but we
Read moreMoving is always listed as one of life’s top stressors. Giving up the familiar—friends, favorite places, and routines— is not easy for anyone and can cause fear, sadness and stress. While it’s important to acknowledge your teenager’s unhappiness with a move, there are some ways for parents to reduce some of the more traumatic aspects of moving: Recognize Teachable Moments
Read moreUnfortunately, a natural conflict tends to exist between parents and teens: teens desire to resist limits and adults are committed to enforcing limits. This battle of control leads to power struggles. Many of us realize when we get in a power struggle with our child, but we don’t always know how to get out of them. Fortunately, there is hope!
Read moreLast week, our blog explored why colleges and employers are increasingly complaining that today’s young adults are not prepared for life after high school. Experts say that one of the causes for this problem is “helicopter parents,” parents who are overinvolved, do everything for their teens and rescue their teens from any difficulties. Young adults raised by helicopter parent tend
Read moreIn the last few years, colleges and employers have complained that today’s young adults lack the necessary skills needed for success. Colleges and employers feel it is “very important” that high school graduates possess a high level of responsibility and accountability, a strong work ethic, good communication skills, the ability to work in a team, and good problem solving skills.
Read moreParents of teens have a difficult job. We are somehow supposed to encourage open communication with a person who rolls their eyes, slams doors, and generally acts like we don’t know anything. It can feel difficult to know what to say or how to say it. As a result, we can sometimes fall into the trap of using scare tactics
Read moreA new study from the University of Michigan’s School of Information recently found that children, age 10-17 years old, were more than twice as likely as their parents to say they’re concerned about adults sharing too much information about them online. While past studies have often focused on adult concerns about their children’s social media use, this study examined the
Read moreAs a parent of a teenager, you’re most likely walking a fine line between letting your teen have independence and monitoring their activities to ensure their safety. It’s hard to know where that line should be, and there are many differing opinions on the matter. Teens protest that they need more privacy, while the news tells you everything that could
Read moreThe holidays are supposed to be a time of great joy and celebration. However, we all know that that is not always the case when we have teens! We want you and your loves ones to have the best holidays possible, so we offer these recommendations: Get their input. Don’t assume you know how your teen wants to spend the
Read moreDoes it seem like your teen has plenty to say to their friends, but nothing to say to you? It can be so frustrating to see your child share more openly with their peers and clam up when they are with you. Although this is common in adolescence, there are things that you can do to get your teens to
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